Relationship questionnaire (RQ): free template and scoring guide

Key Takeaways

The relationship questionnaire is a validated self-report assessment measuring adult attachment styles and relationship satisfaction in couples therapy.

The Relationship Questionnaire (RQ) is a 4-item instrument developed by Bartholomew and Horowitz (1991) that categorizes attachment patterns: secure, anxious-preoccupied, dismissive-avoidant, and fearful-avoidant.

Screening for intimate partner violence before administering satisfaction questionnaires is essential; RAS scores may be misleading in coercive relationships.

Pabau’s digital forms and client portal streamline questionnaire administration, automatic scoring, and secure storage for treatment planning and outcome measurement.

Download your free relationship questionnaire

A relationship questionnaire is a validated self-report tool that measures a client’s attachment style, relationship satisfaction, and interpersonal patterns in a romantic partnership. The best-known version is the Relationship Questionnaire (RQ), a 4-item measure of adult attachment developed by Bartholomew and Horowitz in 1991.

As a relationship counseling questionnaire, the RQ is used at intake and again later in treatment, moving couples therapy and individual relationship counseling from impression-based conversation to data you can score and track. This guide covers the main validated instruments, how to administer and score them, and how to run the whole process digitally.

What is a relationship questionnaire?

A relationship questionnaire is a self-report assessment tool designed to measure attachment styles, relationship satisfaction, and interpersonal functioning in romantic partnerships. The most widely used relationship questionnaire is the Relationship Questionnaire (RQ), developed by Bartholomew and Horowitz in 1991.

The RQ is a 4-item instrument where clients rate their preferred relationship style across four prototypical attachment patterns: secure, anxious-preoccupied, dismissive-avoidant, and fearful-avoidant. Unlike lengthy assessments, the relationship questionnaire captures core attachment dynamics in minutes, making it practical for intake and ongoing monitoring.

Other validated relationship questionnaires therapists use include the Relationship Assessment Scale (RAS), a 7-item measure of general relationship satisfaction, and the Experiences in Close Relationships-Revised (ECR-R), which assesses anxiety and avoidance dimensions. The Gottman Relationship Checkup combines questionnaire items with automatic analysis to identify relationship strengths and areas of concern.

All four instruments share a clinical purpose: to give therapists objective data about relationship patterns, enabling more targeted interventions and measurable outcome tracking. A relationship questionnaire moves couples therapy from impression-based assessment to measurement-based care (MBC), a best-practice standard endorsed by the American Psychological Association (APA).

How to use a relationship questionnaire in therapy

Administering a relationship questionnaire follows a straightforward five-step workflow:

1. Screen for safety. Before you administer any relationship questionnaire, screen for intimate partner violence (IPV), coercion, or controlling behavior. In unsafe relationships, satisfaction scores mislead, because a partner may report “satisfaction” despite emotional or physical harm. Ask directly about safety. If IPV is present, prioritize safety planning before any relationship assessment.
2. Introduce the relationship questionnaire. Frame the assessment as a collaborative tool, not a judgment. Explain: “This helps us understand your relationship patterns so we can work toward your goals.” Hand the client a paper or digital copy, or administer verbally during session depending on their preference and client record setup.
3. Administer without coaching. Let clients complete the relationship questionnaire independently. Avoid clarifying items during completion. Responses should reflect their genuine perception, not what they think you want to hear. Typical completion time is 3-5 minutes.
4. Score and interpret immediately. Calculate scores using the provided scoring guide (usually available in the questionnaire PDF or clinical manual). For the RQ, identify the dominant attachment style. For the RAS, sum item ratings to get a total satisfaction score (range 7-35; higher scores indicate greater satisfaction).
5. Discuss results and integrate into treatment planning. Share findings collaboratively: “Your profile shows [attachment style/satisfaction level]. This explains some patterns we’ve talked about. Let’s discuss what you’d like to work on.” Document the questionnaire score, interpretation, and resulting treatment goals in the client record for continuity of care and outcome measurement.

Digital administration streamlines this. With practice management software like Pabau, clients complete the questionnaire through online client portals before they arrive, scores auto-calculate through automated workflows, and results flow straight into the client record. That saves session time and keeps administration consistent from one client to the next.

Book a demo to automate relationship assessments

Streamline intake and treatment monitoring with Pabau

Automate relationship questionnaire administration, scoring, and clinical documentation in one integrated platform.

Book a demo

Who is the relationship questionnaire helpful for?

A relationship questionnaire earns its place for anyone doing structured work with couples, families, or individuals in relationship counseling:

• Therapists and counselors assess attachment patterns before choosing an intervention.
• Psychiatrists and nurse practitioners fold relationship data into psychiatric evaluation to see the relational stressors behind depression, anxiety, or trauma.
• Psychologists and clinical social workers track couples therapy progress and measure outcomes.
• Coaches and wellness practitioners keep relationship conversations grounded in data rather than intuition.
• Occupational therapists address relational patterns that affect day-to-day functioning.
• Group, family, and integrative mental health practices standardize intake and build a shared view of patient compliance and engagement.

Benefits of using a relationship questionnaire

Objective assessment: Questionnaires replace impression-based judgment with validated data, reducing clinician bias and improving diagnostic accuracy. Measurement-based care is an APA best-practice standard for improving outcomes.

Faster intake: A 4-item questionnaire captures attachment style in minutes, letting therapists focus session time on exploring meaning and goals rather than gathering information.

Progress monitoring: Administering the same questionnaire at intake, mid-treatment, and discharge creates a quantitative record of change — critical for demonstrating treatment effectiveness and informing adjustments to the clinical plan.

Treatment planning clarity: Attachment style and satisfaction scores pinpoint which interventions are most relevant. Anxious-preoccupied clients benefit from boundaries and secure-base work; dismissive-avoidant clients need vulnerability and emotional expression practice.

Documentation compliance: Standardized questionnaire administration and scoring provide clear evidence of clinical assessment, supporting regulatory compliance (HIPAA and GDPR) and insurance reimbursement records.

Clinical safety: Screening for intimate partner violence

Screen for intimate partner violence (IPV) before you administer any relationship questionnaire. Satisfaction scores become unreliable in coercive relationships, because a partner may report “satisfaction” while being unsafe. The Relationship Assessment Scale (RAS) and similar tools carry an explicit caution that in cases of IPV or coercion, satisfaction scores can mislead.

Use direct, safety-focused questions first: “Do you ever feel afraid of your partner?” “Has your partner ever hit, pushed, or physically hurt you?” “Do you feel controlled or isolated in your relationship?” If IPV is disclosed, prioritize safety planning, involve domestic violence specialists, and defer the questionnaire until the client’s safety is secured.

Validated relationship assessment questionnaires and how to score them

Four validated tools cover clinical practice, each suited to a different point in treatment:

• Relationship Questionnaire (RQ) — for fast intake screening. Also referred to as a relationship styles questionnaire, the RQ uses 4 items to measure attachment style. Developed by Bartholomew and Horowitz (1991). Scoring: Clients rate each of four attachment prototypes (secure, anxious-preoccupied, dismissive-avoidant, fearful-avoidant) on a 7-point scale. The highest score indicates the dominant attachment pattern. Simple, fast, suitable for intake.
• Relationship Assessment Scale (RAS) — for tracking satisfaction over time. As a relationship satisfaction questionnaire, the RAS uses 7 items to measure global relationship satisfaction. Scoring: Sum all items (range 7-35). Score 32–35 = high satisfaction; 22–31 = moderate; below 22 = low satisfaction (these are approximate interpretive ranges; consult the original scale manual for normative data). Widely used in research and clinical practice; responsive to therapeutic change.
• Experiences in Close Relationships-Revised (ECR-R) — for a deeper dimensional read. 36 items measuring two areas: anxiety (fear of abandonment) and avoidance (discomfort with intimacy). Scoring: Calculate subscale averages; higher scores indicate greater anxiety or avoidance. More detailed than RQ or RAS; suitable for clients wanting deeper insight.
• Gottman Relationship Checkup (Sound Relationship House Questionnaire) — for a structured, multi-domain checkup. A longer online questionnaire built around Gottman’s Sound Relationship House model, covering domains such as trust, commitment, and conflict management alongside satisfaction. Scoring is automated, with a practitioner report breaking results down by domain. Best suited to a full relationship audit rather than a quick intake screen.

Consult the Psychiatric Evaluation Template for integration of questionnaire results into comprehensive mental health assessments. The APA’s Marriage Checkup Practitioner Guide offers supplemental scoring and interpretation guidance for the Gottman-based approach.

Integrating relationship questionnaires into digital clinical workflows

Digital tools take the friction out of administration. In a telehealth or in-person workflow, you upload the relationship questionnaire once as a digital form. Clients complete it before arrival or at intake through secure client portals. Results auto-score and sync into the client record, where you review findings and document treatment decisions.

That cuts paperwork, keeps administration consistent, prevents lost forms, and supports measurement-based care, all while keeping client data safe under HIPAA and GDPR. For group therapy, family sessions, or multi-location practices, centralized compliance tracking confirms every questionnaire is completed, scored, and reviewed before the session starts.

Attachment theory and the relationship questionnaire context

Attachment theory, rooted in John Bowlby and Mary Ainsworth’s research, explains how early relational experiences shape adult relationship patterns.

The Relationship Questionnaire operationalizes attachment theory by measuring four adult attachment styles: secure attachment (comfort with intimacy and autonomy), anxious-preoccupied attachment (fear of abandonment, need for reassurance), dismissive-avoidant attachment (discomfort with emotional closeness), and fearful-avoidant attachment (conflicted desire for connection and fear of it).

Knowing a client’s relationship attachment styles helps you read patterns: Why one client withdraws under stress, why another needs constant reassurance, why a third struggles to trust. Attachment-informed therapy uses that insight to build a secure therapeutic relationship and teach healthier relational skills.

Aron et al. (1997) found that structured, reciprocal self-disclosure can build closeness between strangers in about 45 minutes, a reminder that a well-designed set of patient engagement questions is itself a clinical tool.

The bottom line

A relationship questionnaire gives therapists and clients a shared language for relational patterns. Whether you reach for the 4-item RQ for quick attachment screening, the 7-item RAS for satisfaction monitoring, or the 36-item ECR-R for a deeper read, the payoff is the same: A measurable baseline you can set goals against and track over time.

Run it through digital forms and client portals so administration and scoring stay quick and secure. Book a demo to see how Pabau handles questionnaire workflow, outcome measurement, and clinical documentation in one place.

Continue your research

Need a structured mental health intake? Psychiatric Evaluation Template provides a comprehensive assessment framework integrating relationship questionnaire results into full diagnostic evaluation.

Looking to build secure client relationships? Client portal features enable private, HIPAA-compliant questionnaire administration and secure sharing of results with your therapy team.

Want to track therapy progress over time? Client record management centralizes all questionnaire scores, treatment notes, and outcome data in one searchable clinical chart.

Frequently asked questions